Friday, February 22, 2008

I Smell Like Meat


Soapmaking is a learning experience. Some scents work better than others. And some oils have better moisturizing abilities. It's kind of a trial and error, even if you use a soap recipe.

A month ago, I embarked on a new adventure. Lard soap. I had never made it before and I thought it might be different to try. I read everything I could find. At first the soap smelled so good and lavendery. I added dried, crushed lavender and even though it was very speckled and mouse-poopish, it smelled like a winner.

Fast forward four weeks. The time it took for this soap to cure.

I decided to try the soap yesterday. At first, all was well. Then, something went awry. After the soap was wet and lathery, it started to smell like meat. I wasn't sure if it was an olfactory malfunction or in my head. But I started to smell like meat. The more I washed, the more I smelled it.

I was afraid to go outside. What if all the neighborhood dogs could smell it and they wanted to sniff me or eat me? I had visions of me looking like the pied piper with hungry, barking dogs chasing after me.

I smelled the same bar of soap yesterday afternoon. And it smells like lavender again. I don't get it. Now I'm thinking of new names for this soap. Like "How to Catch a Man (or Dog) Soap" or "Manly Meat Soap" (men like meat, right?). Any other suggestions? Have any single friends who want a man or a dog?

* * *
Last night Joe was in the ER for six hours for a bad viral stomach thing. He was severely dehydrated and they gave him a few IVs of fluids. Poor guy drove himself. We couldn't reach nearby friends or family and he didn't want me to have to take all of the kids in with us. My mother offered to take him to the hospital, but he didn't want to make her drive the 20 minutes to get him and the 20 minutes to the hospital. She was more than happy to do it. She commented, "It's not like he's asking me to drive him to Wal-Mart, although if he really had to go, I'd take him, too."

21 comments:

Katie Jean said...

Oh, that title made me laugh! I wonder what went wrong. I don't know anything about soap making, so I'm no help. All I can picture is you walking down the street with a pack of dogs following!

I hope Joe feels better. John had to drive himself to the hospital on new years eve. What men!

Karyn said...

Ok, it was just as funny reading about the "meat soap" the second time as it was the first. Now, are you POSITIVE the meat smell wasn't just in your head?

And, I'm glad Joe's going to be fine. It's unfortunate that he had to go through so much pain though.

One Sweet Life said...

So sorry about your husband! The virus going around this year is really bad. Glad he got some fluids and can be on the mend now!

miss chris said...

Meat soap. I think I'll pass. My husband reeeallly likes bacon though -- do you make that scent too? ;)

Poor Joe! I hope he recovers quickly.

Lola...again said...

I saw a bacon strip car air freshener...Why not Meat soap??

Sorry about Joe! Hope he is feeling better soon...and that all of the kids don't get it!

Sarah and Jack said...

LOL, I can only think of those dogs in A Christmas Story.

(And the wal-mart thing was a bit funny too. Not funny that he had to go the ER though. That place is the pit of the earth.)

laeroport said...

Ack! I hope Joe is okay! Nothing like driving yourself to the hospital. What a man!

Maybe he'd like some manly meat soap?

crazycat13 said...

Hey Lera! My husband and I had much fun reading your entry about your soap. And he just said: What about "MeatEater"?

And the best wishes for your husband!

Kind regards from Germany,
Ines

nikko said...

I hope Joe is feeling better today. That is no fun!

Meat soap -- interesting. Do you still smell like meat? ;o)

utmommy said...

Sometimes when I cook with onions I swear I can smell it on my skin for days.

hooli said...

OK Miss L...
funny funny meat story. I was just rolling and then I ran into your post script. you just know how to sneak up and floor someone, don't you?
Poor hubby. I know you'll take good care. What a nightmare when you're sick and you can't figure out how to balance the whole kid thing.
So sorry to hear it. Hope he's on the mend. Are you sure it wasn't the meat soap that made him sick? just kidding.

Anonymous said...

i am still laughing about our conversation on the "Meat Soap" ME

Cici said...

haha!

boy is that a nasty virus, it here this week, too. hope your husband is feeling better.

Little Munchkins said...

The soap story is too funny. I assume that you don't have dogs at home then?

Poor Joe, I hope he is feeling better now.

Stacey said...

How about "Fresh Meat"! I can't even imagine what it smelled like...I love meat/chicken, but the raw smell.....YuCk!
You are to funny about Wal-Mart...I totally understand what she is talking about.

Have a good weekend.....

Chara Michele said...

I hope Joe is feeling better!

The meat soap makes me laugh, it is good you don't have pets! :)

Melanie said...

"How to Meat the Man of your Dreams soap"? Sorry never made soap so I'm no help.

Sorry to hear about Joe. Hope it's only a 24hour thing and the rest of you don't catch it.vzhaif

industrialpoppy said...

Utterly hilarious-you could market this soap on a late-night infomercial targeted at singles. Too funny!

amandajean said...

you are too funny!

Emily said...

Sorry to hear about your DH, hope he has fully recovered. Gosh, he's put everyone else above him! Dont you just love him like that!

Alisha said...

I needed a good laugh today:) THANKS! The way I see it....there are people out there who like the smell of gasoline...so why not the smell of meat?! LOL! You could totally market this to Petsmart...hehe

sorry your hubby is feeling bad...sending get well vibes in your direction:)