Sunday, September 09, 2007

In Sweet Memory

Five years ago today, my sister, Kristen, died tragically in a car accident. She was a young mother of two. I miss her dearly. Sometimes it seems that it was yesterday (when I feel the pain). Sometimes it feels longer (when I try to remember the last time I saw her; the last time I talked to her; the last time I heard her voice). All week, my chest has felt a tightness when I thought of her and the impending anniversary. Actually, most times I think of her my chest tightens and I feel sad. Sometimes, when I think of her I smile. But most times, I'm sad.
She was a wonderful girl. A wonderful mom. Very sweet. And funny. And many more wonderful qualities.

She died on my parents' 35th wedding anniversary. She died when Mason was two weeks old. Mason, Spenser, and Sawyer have never met her. Taylor, Carter, and Jackson vaguely remember her. Yet, they all know her. From the photos. From the stories. From her children, Alana and Timmy. I try to keep her memory alive. It's all I have left.

(Krissy was famous for her self-portraits. This is one of Krissy with her daughter, Alana. The top photo is of me and Kristen the night before her wedding.)

20 comments:

Alisa said...

Lera; Sending you hugs on this hard day. I can't imagine the pain of losing a sister. Alisa

kirsten said...

virtual hugs heading your way. i'm sorry you have to miss your sister, she sounds fun, but i'm glad you'll see her again, and i'm glad you keep her memory alive for your kids.

Karyn said...

Such a sad story Lera. I think it's great that you're keeping her spirit alive. :)

I'm sure she's missed by all.

Sarah and Jack said...

Oh Lera. That is hard. (And her kids, that makes me choke up.)

nikko said...

(((hugs)))

You must miss her so much. I can't imagine how your heart must be breaking today remembering her.

Sonja said...

Oh Lera. How sad. I'm so sorry you lost your sister. I'd love to be able to hug you... perhaps you can get your husband to hug you once for me!

Heidijayhawk said...

::squeezes:: i can feel the love and loss through your sweet words. i cherish my sister so much and couldn't imagine my life without her there.

amandajean said...

I can't imagine losing my sisters...I feel for you! Keep telling the stories to keep the memories alive. Hugs to you, my dear.

randi---i have to say said...

I am sending you some hugs today. So sorry for your loss. I think it is wonderful that you share you sister with the world so that she is remembered.

TinkerBlue said...

Hugs for you. And for Alana and Timmy. Keep telling the stories and showing the pictures. Keep the memories and remember her spirit. You will always be sisters.

Lora said...

Sending you hugs!!

Anonymous said...

I Love you!! ME

Wendy said...

My mom died 10 years ago (breast cancer) and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't miss her. She never got to meet any of her grandkids and that is what makes me the saddest.

I'll hold you and your family in my heart this week. It gets better, little by little.

Peace to you.

beki said...

Dear sweet Lera, I wish you peace as you deal with your grief. I can't even imagine what you're going through.

laeroport said...

Hugs, my dear! Car accidents are such a tragedy. And when the victim is so young, so vital, so needed by their family, it is even more tragic. It is a hard loss to bear.

Alicia A. said...

Thinking of you, sweetheart. It must be such a difficult day.

Laura said...

Sending hugs, thoughts, and prayers to you and all your family.

Little Munchkins said...

I cannot imagine how hard it must be for you. Take care.

Chara Michele said...

Sending you hugs. I can't imagine how difficult it would be to go through this...

FinnyKnits said...

Good on you for keeping her memory alive with everyone, despite how much it must hurt.

*Big hug*