Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Today I am full of gratitude.
One year ago today I embarked on a very scary journey. I was pregnant and bleeding and confined to bedrest. I was so terrified that I had lost, or would lose, my baby. Although I have had a miscarriage in the past, this seemed worse. The pain and sorrow I felt as we drove to my sonogram was deeper than I imagined. I tried to be strong for Joe. And he tried to stay strong for me. The truth is, neither one of us was very strong. It was a silent car ride, aside from our sobbing.
When we received the news that the baby had a heartbeat, I wept. I grabbed Joe's hand tightly and prayed. I was so very grateful. So. Very. Grateful. For the month of bedrest (and the subsequent months of pregnancy) I was worried that something would happen to our baby.
Today I have a beautiful, healthy six-month-old baby boy, whom I completely adore. Countless times I have whispered in his ear, repeatedly, "I'm so happy you're here. I'm so happy you're here."
I'm so happy he's here. He has completed our family. I am so grateful that he is a part of my family. A part of my life. He is a perfect fit. He is a sweet, sweet blessing.
So today, if I am silent, just know that I am holding Sawyer a little tighter, kissing him, and whispering "I'm so happy you're here. I'm so happy you're here" in his ears.